


Loving You

by EmmzyPlayz



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Anal Sex, Confrontations, M/M, One Shot, One-Sided Attraction, Pining, Praise Kink, Wet Dream
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:13:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25322200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmmzyPlayz/pseuds/EmmzyPlayz
Summary: Zed has been in love with Shen since they were young, but as they say...'The Eye of Twilight is blind to all that may affect its judgement'. However, following the death of Zed's Master and Shen's father, Zed is faced with both his feelings as well as his guilt. Can he finally face the past and confront Shen?
Relationships: Aphelios/Shieda Kayn, Shen/Zed (League of Legends)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 55





	Loving You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bekkomi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bekkomi/gifts).



> I know this is SUPER late, and I apologize. Enjoy <3

For:  _ @Bekkomi _ for a trade :)

Note: This is after the Zed comic, but has some flair/additional stuff to it. An example, in my version Kayn and Aphelios met at some point during a mission following this and Kayn fell for him hard, but they had to part due to Aphelios’s belief and duty coming first. Similarly, Shen and Zed parallel this with Zed loving Shen from afar only to have to let him go for his honor.

  
  
  


It is said that  _ The Eye of Twilight is blind to all that may affect its judgement.  _ To say it is false would be a lie. Zed knew this all too well from his own personal experiences. Zed, who had spent all his childhood chasing a man who could never love him back as he fruitlessly trained, joked, and even shared a room with the man he called his best friend. The  _ one _ person who understood him...the person he'd betrayed.

Yes, Zed had betrayed him...spinning Shen along with the belief that he had killed Shen's own father. It had been a lie...once. Yet, it seemed fate had other plans for Zed and Shen...for what was once a lie had become a reality only so many months earlier. The day Zed had to strike down his best friend's father due to the shadows he had worked so hard to master consuming the man he once knew. Shen had years on Zed to grieve what had been a lie. For Zed...he still mourned. He still healed. 

The white haired assassin sighed as he gazed out over the lush, vibrant, and colorful forests of Ionia that seemed to stretch on forever from where he sat. He'd been taking much of his time to distance himself and practice keeping his emotions guarded from his followers. He didn't want to show weakness to them, he was a leader. Someone to look up to, and he needed to guide them to help protect their homeland. He only wished another saw what he was doing and understood all he had sacrificed to get here. Zed had to be the shadow to bring Shen into the light. He still felt pain from all that had happened to do so...and the final outcome of it all. To think he would go so far as to hurt the person he loved so much. It was disgusting and shameful.

A small ‘tch’ came from him as he balled up his fists and shook his head as if attempting to clear it. He sighed, closing his eyes as he sat cross legged. He then rested his hands together in his lap and breathed in...and out. When Zed had first begun training after proving himself to Master Kusho, this had been one of the first things he’d been taught. The simple lesson of clearing his mind as to better focus on his surroundings. 

As he took in deep breaths and vindicated his mind of all worries and thoughts of the past, he listened at the noise of his homeland. The gentle breeze that stirred the leaves on the trees, tugging at his hair and caressing his skin. The scent of rich earth and flowers that tickled his nose. The sound of chirping birds that called out to, yearning for companionship that may or may not come. The idea of companionship brought a face to mind again, and he felt himself growing agitated again. As he went to mentally scold himself, he almost missed the sound of a twig snapping beneath something or someone’s feet... _ almost _ .

It is on instinct that he comes alive, counting in his mind the two seconds it takes to be on his feet, blades on his arms extended at the person.  _ One second too long _ , he thinks from years of disciplined training, but he casts away the fleeting thought. It is only when he realizes who is there, he forces himself to relax and retract the blades. "I wasn't expecting anyone to follow me. Trust it to be you, Kayn," he says to his most prized pupil.

"You know me well, Master Zed. Though I must say, you've gotten a bit slow. Out of practice since Shen beat you on the beach?" Kayn asks slyly as Zed turns away from him to overlook the view again.

"You just can't get enough of that, can you?" Zed sighs as Kayn steps up beside him.

"Hm...no," Kayn replies, and Zed knows he has a shit-eating grin plastered on his face right now.

Zed can't help but smile just slightly at the pupil at his side. The playful teasing Kayn is only momentarily allowed gives Zed a sense of former youth he once possessed. Back when things were easier...and he still had someone he cherished at his side. “Why’d you come all the way out here, my student?”

“I should be asking you the same thing, Master Zed. You’ve been distant...the members have noticed. There has been talk...doubts…murmurs that you’re losing yourself like Lord Kusho did.”   
  
Zed is silent for a few moments before finally turning to Kayn. “Do you believe them?”

“...No,” says Kayn finally. “You’re much more than Lord Kusho was, Master Zed. You’re not so easily lost. However, you have been...distant. Is it Shen?”

“Hm, you know me well.”

Kayn puts his hands behind his head and grins. “Always, Master Zed. Why don’t you just talk to him?”   
  
Zed sighs and responds sarcastically, “Yes, because I’m sure Shen will listen to me after I ran.”

“Master Zed...he was your childhood best friend. He may hate and resent you, but you were still best friends. Just try.”

Zed closes his eyes briefly. He then reopens them, staring out over the forests, mind deep in thoughts once more.

* * *

It was not often that Zed found it hard to sleep. Infact, if anything...it was his dreams that made him restless - or more like the nightmares. Getting to sleep had never been an issue before, but now...he couldn’t stop thinking of the conversation he and Kayn had earlier.

_ “...Why don’t you just talk to him?” _

_ “...he was your childhood best friend. He may hate and resent you, but you were still best friends. Just try…” _

Zed gritted his teeth, laying an arm over his eyes. It was so  _ simple _ for Kayn to say, but he didn’t understand the bigger picture. If he did...he had no experience...except for Aphelios. Even then, Kayn was young, a child in his eyes. Yes, he’d lost someone in a similar fashion to Zed, but he’d not had years to grow with Aphelios. It had been a faithful mission that brought the two together only for them to be forced apart. Aphelios’s duty had called, and he had to put it before Kayn. As a result, they’d gone through a similar departure to that of Shen and Zed’s relationship.

Zed sighed deeply as he attempted to relax and quell his mind again. Yet, he found it impossible with Shen being constantly on his mind. He attempted once more to sleep as his eyes closed.

* * *

_ Zed’s eyes cracked open to the ceiling of his room. The cream color stared back as always...until it wasn’t. Instead he was met with a tanned face, fiery ginger hair that was loose from its prison of a bun, and gentle purple eyes. The white haired assassin felt his breath taken away momentarily at the sight of him...and then came the confusion and worry. “Shen...what…?” he started, but he only received a simple hushing in response. _

_ He was caught off guard as Shen leaned in and pressed smooth lips to his own chapped ones. He was also now acutely aware that he was nude and pressed into the soft bed sheets by Shen...who was almost completely nude as well. His hands pressed to Shen’s chest as confusion and concern clouded his mind. He briefly pulled away, looking down at him. “Zed...I thought you wanted this?” he asks in that voice that makes Zed want to melt.  _

_ “I-I do, but…” he starts. _

_ “Then let me give you what you’ve waited for all this time…” _

_ With that, Shen dipped his head and pressed feather light kisses to Zed’s neck. It drew a small gasp from the smaller of the two as Shen trailed kisses down his neck to his chest. It was only when the warm, pink tongue of his companion brushed to his nipple that Zed finally moaned, tensing slightly beneath him, but also relaxing with each coaxing touch and lick. His left hand found its way to Shen’s hair as he grasped and tugged gently as his right found the sheets. He fisted them as Shen gave him attention, licking and sucking on his left nipple till he moved to the right. _

_ Zed was left a panting mess by the time Shen was done giving his chest attention. His pale face was flushed and pinkened. He met Shen’s amused eyes with half-closed eyes and a lustful gaze. “S-Shen…” he moaned softly as the redhead gave a final lick to his nipple before pulling away to stand up. Zed watched as he slowly removed the last of his clothing, the man’s dick popping free of its restraints. His muddy brown-gold eyes must have gave away his surprise, and he heard Shen chuckle.  _ _   
_ _   
_ _ “Is something wrong?” came the teasing remark. _

_ “No...not at all,” he muttered stubbornly as the bed dipped beneath Shen’s weight. _

_ “Good,” he says before placing his fingers to Zed’s lips. “Open up.” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ He obeyed with some reluctance, wetting Shen’s fingers as he sucked on them. He could hear Shen murmuring praises, telling him how good he was. Zed wanted more of it. To hear praises from him...to feel him...to love have him love him just as much as Zed loved Shen. With a small ‘pop’ noise, Shen pulled his fingers from Zed’s mouth. He then leaned in, replacing them with his mouth. _

_ Zed moaned, parting his lips as the two ninja began to make out. Zed’s eyes fluttering closed briefly, only to shoot open as he felt those wet digits press to his hole. He stiffened slightly, and Shen hushed him as he coaxed him to relax. He attempted to as kisses were pressed to his face in such a gentle manner that he was once more putty in Shen’s hands. A sharp gasp came from him as Shen eased two fingers inside of him, slowly stretching and massaging him.  _

_ It was a strange feeling. Zed had never given himself to anyone, nor had he made love to anyone. Shen would be his first...just as he always wanted. He’d never had eyes for anyone except Shen. Now, here they were doing the one thing he’d never thought he could have. He moaned again as Shen slowly pumped his fingers in and out of Zed, occasionally curling them or scissoring him to ease him open more.  _

_ His hand finds its way to Shen’s hair again, tugging and eliciting a moan from Shen. “Sh-Shen…” he whispers, gazing at him as he pulled his fingers out. “...p-please…” _

_ He smiled at Zed, adjusting his position as he sat back and lined up the tip of his dick with Zed’s ass. “Are you ready?” he asks, and Zed nods as he bites his bottom lip.  _

_ Shen reaches out with his left hand, catching Zed’s right and interlocking their fingers as he slowly begins to push his length into Zed. His mouth formed an ‘o’ shape, eyes going wide at the feeling of being filled slowly by Shen. His dick brushing past spots that made feelings of bliss and desire rush through him. He felt an ache and faint pain from the stretching as Shen slowly, but surely took his virginity. He felt more pressure with each edge of Shen’s cock into him, and he winced slightly. _

_ Instantly, Shen peppered his face with kisses and praise, going slower and stopping when it grew painful or uncomfortable. It was some time till Shen finally bottomed out, holding Zed close as he stilled inside of him. Soft gasps were coming from the white haired assassin as he adjusted to the pressure and the new feeling of being filled completely. It took a minute or two before he finally said breathily, “Move…” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ Shen obliged, slowly moving out of him and back in. Zed gasped as he was slowly eased further open, the painful stretch easing into a blissful feeling that made Zed curl his toes with delight. He’d not felt this much pleasure before...not even when he’d get himself off to the thought of Shen. As his eyes moved to Shen’s face, he breathed out, “...I love you...Shen.” _ _   
_ _   
_ _ He didn’t get a reply. Instead, Shen leaned in and kissed him...and for once that was enough for Zed. He kissed him back, eyes fluttering closed as they made love passionately. _

* * *

Zed’s eyes opened to the ceiling of his room again. A dizzy smile on his face. However, it faded as he looked over to find an empty bed and reality set in that it had been a dream. Shen hadn’t been there, and Zed was alone again. He lifted his sheets, sighing as he saw he’d made a mess of himself in the night from his lustful fantasy. He’d thought that perhaps for once it had been real, but...it wasn’t once again. He slowly sat up on the edge of his bed, eyes dull with disappointment and loneliness. Once more his mind wandered to Kayn’s words.

_ “...Why don’t you just talk to him?” _

  
  
  


Perhaps it was time to visit his old friend.

* * *

  
  


To say he was walking into the lion’s den would be an understatement. He hadn’t dared walk the steps of the Kinkou Monastery that Shen had built up following his betrayal at the former temple that once housed his Order of Shadows. Now that fallen temple was abandoned completely, left to the mercy of the nature of Ionia to reclaim it. Zed found it funny in a way, the balance of Ionia always seemed to restore itself and consume what was once man-made and human. The nature here was so very alive and was very much his home...which is why he had to protect it in a way that Shen never could.

To say he was a little nervous would be an understatement, but Zed was never one to give away his emotions much. He’d only ever occasionally gone to the Kinkou Monastery to try to catch a glimpse at the man he still loved, even if for a fleeting moment. Yet here he was now, sneaking through the entirety of the monastery just to try to confront someone who might not even hear him out. All he could think was how stupid of an idea this was as he silently rounded a corner to see a tsuboniwa. It was gorgeous with lush, thick grass, a small path of pebbles and stones that lead to a koi pond, and a small bench…and on that bench was Shen.

He looked as breathtaking as ever. Red hair pulled back into a mostly neat bun with a strand or two of hair that fell into his face. His eyes were closed, and he wore his typical garbs. He looked peaceful...calm even. Zed wanted nothing more than to go to him and hug him, to tell him the truth. To tell him of his father...of his feelings...but he couldn't. It dawned on him then all the things he  _ couldn't  _ do. Yet, the longer he stared, the more his heart called for the man...till finally he couldn’t take it anymore. He  _ had _ to tell him...before he didn’t get the chance to again. He took a step forward, making his presence known. As their eyes met, he could see the mix of emotion on his face, but mainly the disbelief. His lips parted as he spoke,

  
  


“Shen…”


End file.
